101 Pickup Lines...

Here is 101 pickup lines for your enjoyment. Revieved these in an e-mail today!!



101. I'm a milkman. Want it in the front or the back?
100. My friends call me Orange. Wanna squeeze me?
99. My friends call me Booger. Wanna eat me?
98. My friends call me scab. You should pick me.
97. I'm a pilot. Can I see your cockpit?
96. My friends call me Santa. Wanna sit on my lap?
95. My name is butthole. Whats up yours?
94. My name is richard, but my friends call me dick. Wanna know why?
92. (leaning over to whisper) I think about you when I masturbate.
91. I'm a caveman. Lets go splunking.
90. I'm an army man, wanna see my cannon?
89. I'm a doctor, take your clothes off.
88. Honey, you look better than a new set of snow tires.
87. Your boobees are almost as big as my moms.
86. (While in the country) You're car break down here often?
85. Is that perfume, or did a skunk just spray you?
84. You smell just like the lady at the retirement home.
83. You know, my mother has that same dress.
82. Lets eat Spam.
81. Can I look up your dress?
80. I work at a condom factory, wanna test my product?
79. They don't call me the Italian Stallion for nothing.
78. My name's Clark Kent. Let's go strip in a telephone booth.
77. Put you lippers on my zipper.
76. Wanna know why my friends call me Donut Boy?
75. Didn't I see you on a street corner?
74. Ever think of involving a cat?
73. Is that tuna I smell?
72. Wanna watch a porno?
71. I once won a belching contest. I can prove it.
70. Want to smell my cologne? It cost 2 dollars for a half gallon.
69. I'll take you to McDonalds on prom night.
68. Have I ever used a cheesy pick up line?
67. Can you spell ICUP. I-C-U-P. You saw meee. (laugh profusely)
66. Can you say constantinople backwards? Me neither, but I just wanted to ask
65. Have you ever been caught masturbating?
64. I wanted to play games with your esophagus.
63. What tastes bad, is white and sticky? Mayonnaise dumbass.
62. My penis was blown off in `nam.
61. Is that cellulite or did you put cottage cheese in your skin.
60. When you told me to fuck off was that a no?
59. Would you consider dating a child molester?
58. My name is Todd, and Todd is a gay name.
57. Please excuse me if I appear erect. I am.
56. I'm a police officer, and I will be forced to due a body cavity search.
55. Have you read the "101 pickup lines guarenteed to get the girl" computer file?
54. Do you own the Anarchist Cookbook?
53. Elvis is my father. Who's yo daddy?
52. Have you ever lit your farts on fire? You want to?
51. What color are your pubic hairs?
50. If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?
49. Have you ever played nintendo for 72 hours straight?
48. You are a red red rose, and I'm a little thorny.
47. I'm not wearing any underwear.
46. Lets go bowling.
45. Wanna go for a drive on RUDE 69?
44. Do you have poopies?
43. Lets play bowling. I can shove my fingers in you, then throw you in the gutter.
42. Hey, I know a guy named Robb.

41. I am your puppet.
40. You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Not in my case.
39. Want to see who can pee the farthest?
38. My name's alfalfa. Wanna pluck my sprout?
37. I like to read the comics. How about you?
36. Your the one for me fatty!
35. I'm an Indian. See my totem pole.
34. Whats your sign?
33. Come here often?
32. I drive fast. Wanna burn rubber?
31. My name is Mr. Kernaghan. Let me touch your butt. (captain's note: my 10th grade math teacher)
30. I once went through 4 condoms in one night of masturbating.
29. Honey, your like Walmart. Your open 24 hours a day.
28. Lets make a hot dog.
27. Hey! Is that a wig?
26. Are those real?
25. Pardon me, but how much do you weigh.
24. Good lord those are big feet.
23. If you had six nipples and a wet nose you'd be as good as my dog.
22. You remind me of my first grade teacher!
21. Wait a minute! You are my first grade teacher.
20. Is that your bellybutton, or were you hit by a meteor?
19. Do you want extra sour cream on that?
18. Hi! I support shareware.
17. Hi, are you a butt pirate?
16. Yippee, I'm wet.
15. May I offer you some cheese nips.
14. Your like Radio Shack, everything I want is too expensive.
13. Look! That guys a penis head.
12. I only buy playboy for the articles.
11. I haven't gotten any in 2 years, what about you?
10. Wanna go play twister naked?
09. When I was little I had an erecter set.
08. Ever heard the song Detachable Penis?
07. I'm a pyro, and my fire burns only for you.
06. I wanna put my thingy into your thingy.
05. I work the fries at McDonald's and I save the grease too.
04. Have you ever used spam in bed?
03. Baby...You're Elite.
02. I'm an astronaut. Wanna see my rocket?
01. My name is Butthole. Do you have one?

The Rest of the Week...

Yea for Fall Break!!

In about a hour and a half, I will be heading to Connecticut. I will be there til late Thursday. Then On Friday Afternoon, I will be heading to Athens, Ohio for OU's homecoming!! Can't Wait!!!

What a week....

Sorry for not posting, but the last few days has been crazy!!!

I had to do a couple presentations, take a midterm, and write a midterm for the class I teach(easier said then done). Along with my second job, its just been wild.

Last night was interesting. After a long day @ school, I just wanted to go to my apartment and crash. When I get to my apartment building, there were two flashing police cars there with a bunch of cops at the apartment next to mine. As I went up to my door, a police officer came up to me questioning me about the people who live next to me. I don't even really know the people who live next door to me. yeah, I met them once, but that's about it. they were asking me if I knew of any drug selling and/or gang activity happening at that apartment. I did not know anything about those things. It seems the officers did not believe me @ first. They kept questioning me for a while. Finally, they left me along! I soooo hate the Cincinnati police!!

Fall break is next week (Wed, Thurs, Fri). So excited! I so need a break. FOr Wed and Thurs, I am going to Lime Park, CT to play around with race/sport cars with a friend who drives them all the time. Friday and Saturday I will be going to Ohio University for Homecoming, drinking, partying,and escaping from the "real world."